A Nigeria Lawyer, Kylie Joy Terundu who married her ex-boyfriend after a brief period of courtship took to her Instagram page to narrate how she had to run from the union after realising it was a big mistake and she had to choose to forfeit it or stay in unhappiness forever.
Kylie said she court her husband for just 3 months before they both decide to settle for marriage, one which she regrets ever having. She confesses to leaving the marriage even it has produced daughters because it was far from what she ever expected.
Narrating her ordeal, she writes on her Instagram;
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Isn’t it crazy yet wonderful how unscripted life can be? I mean look at me, if anyone had told me that I would one day be a single mother, I wouldn’t have believed them. I always thought that I would grow old with the one man that I marry; it’s what I wanted, it’s what I grew up witnessing. My parents have been together for 31 years. Though imperfect, I watched my father treat my mother with so much love and respect. They liked eachother's company and I never witnessed dad being cruel to mum. He was always supporting her even when we all knew that she has messed up. It was so beautiful to watch (it still is) and I wanted the same for myself. But, when I got married to the man I met only three Months after “knowing” him (long distance), this dream of mine was not to hold. I tried to make it work, we both did but in the end, I was so miserable (we both were). We were incompatible to say the least and when two persons who have completely different views about life, beliefs and dreams come to live together, the result is chaos. I wasn’t going to cross over; that would have meant losing myself and everything that I believed in. He wasn’t going to cross either – I was then faced with two options: 1. To accept that situation and spend the rest of life wondering what might have been if I had married the man who shared my dreams, ideas, hopes and beliefs. The man who spoke tenderly to me, who saw my soul for what it is, who wanted to take long walks together, play board games, enjoy reading my works and think that I am the most incredible being ever whom he cannot imagine a life without OR 2. Leave and avail myself for the life that I desire. I chose the latter because forever I decided, is too long a time to stay unhappy. It’s being great out here. I’m at peace. My chest doesn’t hurt anymore and I do not dread each passing day. I'm surrounded with the love and support of family and a few good friends. I’m able to further my life and pursue all the things I've always desired to do. Being a single mother has been awesome too, I carry my status with pride, because it really is nothing to feel ashamed about, if anything, I am??
While some support her action, others shamed her for taking such action. read reactions below;
The essence of marriage is for both parties to be happy, though no one is responsible for the other parties happiness, each person has got to get each other back, making the tangle easy though it might be rough.
More so, when deciding to submit the rest of your life to someone in the together forever union, the most vital thing to put into consideration is the mutual compatibility of each, check and confirm if you both shares similar vital views and perspective of life together.
If not, you might want to reconsider your options and call it a quit before you tie the knot, because the secret to a life long union is how well you both can bond.
While some might want to try to work things out, it is important to know that you can’t possibly change people or make them better, oftentimes they just become a bigger version of whom they truly are.
Don’t walk down the aisle just because of how you feel about someone, always use your head in the matters of the heart. Your heart may feel right, but know that forever is a long time and your emotions cannot be all that you need. Mostly what is common sense to know that this is the person you can live with and would be happy waking up beside every single day of your life.
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