Staying unmarried in Nigeria brings a lot of discrimination and disrespect, Single women lament. These set of people across millennials of marriageable age, single mothers as well as widows. A woman commands respect once the ring is spotted on the left hand of her fourth finger. Based on this, several single women who took to Twitter on Wednesday to recount their plight.
A Twitter user identified as Mochievous gave a narration of her mother who is m self accomplished but faces the brunt of being a widow. She said: “Yes, Nigeria is the place where a woman only has value when she is attached to a man. A woman who was attached to a man for most of her life suddenly loses the respect she should have because the man is no longer alive. Let me tell you a personal story. My mother is a landlady. She owns two houses on the same street in an okay part of Lagos. She also owns a school on the same street. So she isn’t doing too badly. She has held same for over 30 years so everyone calls her “mummy” of the area.”
About 8 years ago, I lost my dad. See, my mother is the strongest woman I know. She is like amazing and I’ve never seen her break down for too long. Even when her husband, her mother & her sister died within the space of 5 years.
— Moe (@Mochievous) May 1, 2019
Moe continued: “About 8 years ago, I lost my dad. See, my mother is the strongest woman I know. She is like amazing and I’ve never seen her break down for too long. Even when her husband, her mother & her sister died within the space of 5 years. But last time I was in Lagos, she told me something that broke my heart into a million pieces. She said the people on the street have started to disrespect her because ‘there is no man in her house’. This is despite the fact that she had built credibility on that street for 30 years! She had to ask my bro who also visited recently to go to “show face” with one particular neighbour that had to be a serious pain for her. She told him something that broke my heart some more. You bi man, they will listen to you. I am a woman, my voice can never be loud enough”
She had to ask my bro who also visited recently to go to “show face” with one particular neighbour that had being a serious pain for her. She told him something that broke my heart some more. “You bi man, they will listen to you. I am a woman, my voice can never be loud enough”
— Moe (@Mochievous) May 1, 2019
Laide Agbaje, another Twitter user and shares a similar experience as a single mother. Agbaje recounted: “Not until recently, whenever I was traveling with my daughter I will always wear a band to avoid stupid questions. Our last trip together I didn’t wear any band and when I was asked, “you are traveling alone with her?” I said, “yes, you want to call her father?” He saw I was ready for a fight and he let me go. I sincerely hate this country. God knows.”
Not until recently, whenever I was traveling with my daughter I will always wear a band to avoid stupid questions.
Our last trip together I didn't wear any band and when I was asked "you are traveling alone with her?" I said "yes, you want to call her father?"
— Laide Agbaje (@laideagbaje) May 1, 2019
CNN correspondent, Stephanie Busari equally a single parent describes the situation as “heartbreaking”. Busari said, “I am a solo parent living in Lagos. I experience a form of this erasure regularly. I didn’t realise how much until my brother stayed with me for a while. I suddenly commanded respect because there was a man in my home.”
